Another idea: Get him busted on a possession charge. Given his crappy attitude, and in light of all the BS that that Lohan wench has gotten away with, no judge will even think about anything other than throwing the book at him. Off to prison he goes for, oh, 2-1/2 years or so. On Day One of his sentence he gets to meet his cellmate and future husband, the legendary Bubba. The "honeymoon" begins a few hours afterwards. Bet the little twerp sings a really high note that night. 
