Never Forgotten: a Foster's Home Community  

Go Back   Never Forgotten: a Foster's Home Community > Fan Creations > Fan-Fic Forum

Notices

Fan-Fic Forum Post and discuss Foster's-related stories here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-10-2008, 05:22 PM   #1
WiltsAKGirl17
Dorkfish
 
WiltsAKGirl17's Avatar
Now all I need are dance fans and I can go to Cama'i!  
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Bush Alaska, USA
Posts: 583
Send a message via MSN to WiltsAKGirl17
Default A Question About an OC

Hello, all. As usual, I'm supposed to be doing homework (research paper and a news article reaction worksheet), but I want to ask you guys a question.

I have a series planned out in my head and I've started writing it a bit (the first scene is done). But before I get too deep into it, I was wondering if you guys could help me figure out if I have a dreaded Mary Sue on my hands where my original character (OC) is concerned.

This is the basic info for my OC:
NAME: Jasmine Jacobs DATE OF CREATION: August 4, 1976
HEIGHT: 6' 7" WEIGHT: <I'm not too sure here, but she's really thin>
HAIR COLOR, LENGTH: Blue <Think this color>, long to mid-back
EYE COLOR: Brown
GENERAL DESCRIPTION: Blue skin <Again, think somethin like this color>, very human looking <I have little imagination for things like this, I hate to admit>, and I'm debating adding fairy-like wings here. Pretty sharp dresser-- lots of flowing skirts and dresses.

I don't have a series title yet, but the basic premise is one day, an imaginary friend, Jasmine, shows up at the house out of the clear blue-- no creator or anything-- and asks to stay at the house. She's very very shy and timid, and is convinced that if she causes some sort of trouble at the house, she'll be kicked out, even though the house manifesto states otherwise. Eventually, she gets drawn into the "main set" of friends and their adventures. She's friendly, but-- again-- very timid and shy.

Hopefully, you guys can give me some advice and constructive critiques. If you want more info, please don't hesitate to PM me and I'll get back to you ASAP. A million thanks!
__________________


Anyone can cook, but only the fearless can be great. ~ Ratatouille

Last edited by WiltsAKGirl17; 05-01-2008 at 03:52 PM.
WiltsAKGirl17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2008, 06:28 AM   #2
Ignate
Newly Abandoned
Remember, inactive people will always get a personal text.  
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: A rather small landmass.
Posts: 34
Default

Hm... as long as you don't have every single character falling in love with you or anything.
I don't really see any serious problems with it, we'll see what others have to say.
Ignate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2008, 08:01 AM   #3
pitbulllady
Co-Administrator
 
pitbulllady's Avatar
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 2,276
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by WiltsAKGirl17 View Post
Hello, all. As usual, I'm supposed to be doing homework (research paper and a news article reaction worksheet), but I want to ask you guys a question.

I have a series planned out in my head and I've started writing it a bit (the first scene is done). But before I get too deep into it, I was wondering if you guys could help me figure out if I have a dreaded Mary Sue on my hands where my original character (OC) is concerned.

This is the basic info for my OC:
NAME: Jasmine Jacobs DATE OF CREATION: July 19, 1972
HEIGHT: 6' 7" WEIGHT: <I'm not too sure here, but she's really thin>
HAIR COLOR, LENGTH: Blue <Think this color>, long to mid-back
EYE COLOR: Brown
GENERAL DESCRIPTION: Blue skin <Again, think somethin like this color>, very human looking <I have little imagination for things like this, I hate to admit>, and I'm debating adding fairy-like wings here. Pretty sharp dresser-- lots of flowing skirts and dresses.

I don't have a series title yet, but the basic premise is one day, an imaginary friend, Jasmine, shows up at the house out of the clear blue-- no creator or anything-- and asks to stay at the house. She's very very shy and timid, and is convinced that if she causes some sort of trouble at the house, she'll be kicked out, even though the house manifesto states otherwise. Eventually, she gets drawn into the "main set" of friends and their adventures. She's friendly, but-- again-- very timid and shy.

Hopefully, you guys can give me some advice and constructive critiques. If you want more info, please don't hesitate to PM me and I'll get back to you ASAP. A million thanks!
Sounds like she'd be a good friend for Bloppy Pants, lol. She really doesn't sound too "Mary-Sue-ish", since Mary Sue's are usually Miss Perfection and do not have character "flaws" like shyness or worrying. Plus, their main purpose is usually to fall madly in love with one of the main characters, and it's usually love at first sight, without any bickering or other issues or even a period of time just to get to know each other as friends.

pitbulllady
pitbulllady is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2008, 02:51 PM   #4
antgirl1
Baja Blast my Beloved
 
antgirl1's Avatar
Rapo or Rachel is fine!  
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 1,781
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by WiltsAKGirl17 View Post
<Again, think somethin like this color>
Lol I have an upcoming character who has this color, named Lilac. =P
antgirl1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-14-2008, 11:18 AM   #5
WiltsAKGirl17
Dorkfish
 
WiltsAKGirl17's Avatar
Now all I need are dance fans and I can go to Cama'i!  
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Bush Alaska, USA
Posts: 583
Send a message via MSN to WiltsAKGirl17
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ignate View Post
Hm... as long as you don't have every single character falling in love with you or anything.
I don't really see any serious problems with it, we'll see what others have to say.
Uh, no. Definitely not. Thanks for the thoughts, Ignate!

Quote:
Originally Posted by pitbulllady View Post
Sounds like she'd be a good friend for Bloppy Pants, lol. She really doesn't sound too "Mary-Sue-ish", since Mary Sue's are usually Miss Perfection and do not have character "flaws" like shyness or worrying. Plus, their main purpose is usually to fall madly in love with one of the main characters, and it's usually love at first sight, without any bickering or other issues or even a period of time just to get to know each other as friends.

pitbulllady
When I started developing Jasmine's character, I wanted her to NOT be Miss Perfection and have no character flaws. I mean, she's far from perfect, as the plans I have for her past show, and her shyness is very intense.

I will admit that I do have some romantic motives here, but it's not as you described-- if the episode sequence I have is just so (I plan on writing the series using the series as my time line), the romantic interest won't fully show until what would be the start of season two, so it's not instantaneous; it's not "madly in love," either-- Jasmine has the feelings for the character in question, but it's not sunshine, lollipops and roses. I would almost sugest that she has a mild paranoia that he's not going to love her back or love her and leave her, but I'm still fine-tuning all the details. And trust me, there will be issues in the relationship-- mostly trying to get Jasmine to not be so agonzingly shy and/or to open up to people. The friendship will be developed fairly quickly (again, I need to research episode sequence here), but the romantic interest shouldn't come into play until later.
__________________


Anyone can cook, but only the fearless can be great. ~ Ratatouille
WiltsAKGirl17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2008, 05:37 PM   #6
BabyCharmander
At Home
Mur?  
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 117
Default

You know more about your character than we do. Run your character through a Mary Sue Litmus Test and find out if she's a Sue or not. They aren't the most accurate things in the world and like the intro says, not everything they have listed is something you should never use in a story, ever, but they do give you an idea of how your character is.

I've run my characters through them and some come out fine, but others get high scores. However I haven't had any complaints about those characters yet (and that's saying something 'cuz I've been using some of them for around 7 years now), so don't be too discouraged if your character ends up with a high score.
BabyCharmander is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2008, 11:21 AM   #7
WiltsAKGirl17
Dorkfish
 
WiltsAKGirl17's Avatar
Now all I need are dance fans and I can go to Cama'i!  
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Bush Alaska, USA
Posts: 583
Send a message via MSN to WiltsAKGirl17
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyCharmander View Post
You know more about your character than we do. Run your character through a Mary Sue Litmus Test and find out if she's a Sue or not. They aren't the most accurate things in the world and like the intro says, not everything they have listed is something you should never use in a story, ever, but they do give you an idea of how your character is.

I've run my characters through them and some come out fine, but others get high scores. However I haven't had any complaints about those characters yet (and that's saying something 'cuz I've been using some of them for around 7 years now), so don't be too discouraged if your character ends up with a high score.
Thanks for the link, BabyCharmander. I appreciate it.

I ran Jasmine through the test and it came out rather high (ahem, 49), but based on the response here, I think that I may not have to overhaul her character quite as much as I'd feared. (I realized this morning that I may need to rethink one of the major aspects of the plot line, but I think I can do it. I managed to enlist a friend with one story, so I may draw on her knowledge and ideas.)

Thanks again!
__________________


Anyone can cook, but only the fearless can be great. ~ Ratatouille
WiltsAKGirl17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-16-2008, 12:28 PM   #8
WiltsAKGirl17
Dorkfish
 
WiltsAKGirl17's Avatar
Now all I need are dance fans and I can go to Cama'i!  
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Bush Alaska, USA
Posts: 583
Send a message via MSN to WiltsAKGirl17
Default Drum Roll, Please...

Sorry about the double post.

Well, after several MONTHS of work, here are two major things pertaining to the topic at hand:

1.) Vampyre's drawing of Jasmine-- I'd asked for a drawing of Jasmine, and this is really close to what I'd pictured, so if my description didn't really work for you, try this. (Once again, thanks a million Vampyre! )

2.) Jasmine's debut over on DA, entitled "The Jasmine Chronicles, part One." I'm bad at titles. And I do believe this will be one of the only pieces I can post a link to here-- after this I touch on two subjects (that I can think of right off the top of my head) that may rub people the wrong way and I really don't want to get in trouble. If you're absolutely desperate for a link, well, I dunno what to tell ya. Keep checking my DA page?
__________________


Anyone can cook, but only the fearless can be great. ~ Ratatouille
WiltsAKGirl17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-07-2009, 06:55 AM   #9
HerrimanWasHere
At Home
 
HerrimanWasHere's Avatar
*Non Omnis Moria* "I dislike you with great intensity."  
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Wonderland
Posts: 120
Send a message via MSN to HerrimanWasHere
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyCharmander View Post
You know more about your character than we do. Run your character through a Mary Sue Litmus Test and find out if she's a Sue or not. They aren't the most accurate things in the world and like the intro says, not everything they have listed is something you should never use in a story, ever, but they do give you an idea of how your character is.

I've run my characters through them and some come out fine, but others get high scores. However I haven't had any complaints about those characters yet (and that's saying something 'cuz I've been using some of them for around 7 years now), so don't be too discouraged if your character ends up with a high score.
Haha, I actually ran myself through this test. (I'm thinking of maybe adding myself into a story sometime) I did the "Newcomer" and the "De-Suifiers" parts, and ended up with a 2. (And this is with me factoring what I plan on doing in the story) Feels kinda good knowing that I'm not a "Mary-Sue".
__________________
It's not the best idea to write comments, when you're in a dire need of sleep.

~"No, sir, I make it a rule of mine: the more it looks like Queer Street, the less I ask." ~
HerrimanWasHere is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-07-2009, 11:31 AM   #10
Sparky
Undisputed Ruler of Terrencania
 
Sparky's Avatar
Am not Slave-O-Matic! Am Johnny Five!  
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 5,711
Send a message via ICQ to Sparky Send a message via AIM to Sparky Send a message via MSN to Sparky Send a message via Yahoo to Sparky
Default

I got a negative four on the litmus test once.
Sparky is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 04:30 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.